Every Morning

You wake up every morning

Wondering
what you did wrong
What if you something different,
you had done
Would they still be here

Maybe you did everything wrong
Maybe everything you did was right
Or somewhere in between
no matter the reason
They made their choice
now they're gone,
You feel alone.
And you're left holding pieces.
The pieces of your heart,
And pieces of your life.

But this is not the end,
There is someone who can mend,
To make something new
Can you hear him?
He’s calling to you.

When friends are gone
When you cry, and feel alone.
He whispers, I am here.
When no more tears will come
And your heart is a barren desert
He whispers, I have not forsaken you
When sleep is but a dream
While your thoughts scream
He whispers, Let me hold you

When you scream, scream silently,
Who can love me still?
Can’t you see how I failed?
Is this for real? I’m too tired to care.
But, I have to know, who is this?
That you say can do this.

He is standing at the edge of your life
He is calling to you
I can take your shame,
renew your strength
I will be your calm in the storm
I am all you need
Can you hear me?
I’m calling you.

Let me break through

The walls of shame

Walls of pain

And then you will see

The sun breaking though

I’ll stand with you

For I am the one

who knows you

from the inside out

Chorus 2
When friends are gone
When you cry, and feel alone
I am here, I am here
When no more tears will come
And your heart is a barren desert
I have not, I will not forsake you
When sleep is but a dream
While your thoughts scream
I’ll hold you and wipe your tears away.

I am Jesus and I’m standing at the edge of your life
waiting, waiting for your answer

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The idea for this song originated back in high school. While it’s not perfect, this is what I have so far. I don’t have the music or melody for it. But I still wanted to share it.

Not long after Columbine shooting, all the songs started popping up about all those who lost their lives. I don’t remember how the conversation started but when I was talking to my Mom about it all, she told me something that forever changed my way of thinking about such tragedies. She said that the parents of the shooters lost a son, too. But no one is going to write songs about them. No one is going to remember that they were someone’s child. And they will have to live with the loss and the pain of not just losing a child but that their child took the life of other children; AND everyone treating their children as villains.

After that, I decided to write a song for those parents; because, they deserve compassion and some peace, too. It’s obviously taken me a long time to write it. I didn’t know what to say. Yet somehow, some things life has thrown at me, has given me the words.

Suicide is a very hard thing for any parent to see a child do. But it doesn’t just affect the parents. It touches everyone around them, and everyone around them. When I was a junior in high school, a classmate of ours committed suicide. It was a shock. He and his girlfriend had just had a baby not that long ago. Even though I didn’t know him that well, I couldn’t help think… ‘was there signs? Did I miss them? Is there something I could have done?’ And so on, and so on…

I can’t imagine what a parent feels. So I did not just writing this for the parents of the children from Columbine. But I believe any parent (Christian or not) whose child commits suicide, struggles with more than we can imagine. And I hope if they read this, that this will give them just a little peace.